Sluts and Rings and Shaming, Oh My!
Sluts and Rings and Shaming, Oh My! avatar

Over on one of my favorite blogs:  The Beautiful Kind is a post about Slut Rings. I like the idea of a slut ring.  Sluts, of all genders need our own bling.  We need rings and pendants and t-shirts and great big glowing hats that say “It’s MY body and I FUCKING enjoy living in it!”

Physical pleasure, freely given and freely received, is one of the most primal needs we have.  It’s on level with food, oxygen and shelter.   Why not proclaim proudly to the world that we have a right to our bodies and to our physical and mental health?

Purity Rings are great for those who want to wait.  I don’t care what the reason is.  It doesn’t matter to me if it’s a rationally thought out, consequences and pleasures weighed and judged, or if it’s because the great stern, bearded, sky-man told you so from an inflamed shrubbery. What matters is that it’s their choice. And I deserve that choice too.

At no point will I tell someone their decision about their body is stupid, dirty, wrong, or immoral.  Shame about our selves and our bodies is one of the most evil things you can invoke in someone else.  It destroys the soul, bit by bit, every time it happens.

Society has put the term slut on anyone who takes ownership of their body and their pleasure.  So be it.  I take the title and make it my own.  I am looking for MY slut ring.   And will wear it proudly.

How about you, dear  readers?  How do you display your sluttiness, your ownership of your own body and pleasures?



A new season, a new look.
A new season, a new look. avatar

It’s been more than 3 months since my last post.  A lot has happened since then.   We’re still sorting out everything after our move into a much nicer, and *bigger!* place.  A lot of plans are in the works for how we’re going to make the new house a safe, sane, and pleasurable home.

I’m still working on my AAR for Duckstock this year.  It was a memorable experience and I came away with a profound new insight into my own psyche, as well as a couple of very shiny new additions to my body.   Pictures will be included with the after action report, of course.

Now that the move is done, some really insane deadlines at work are past and with the summer coming in all calm and relaxing, I and the Brat both will have some time to write, and definitely have some nights to write about.

So till then, dear readers, keep it safe, sane, consensual, and happy.



On consent, a political rant.
On consent, a political rant. avatar

I rarely post political rants, but this one needs to be said.  I won’t bore you with yet another blog post about the idiocy going on in congress over birth control coverage, abortion rights, etc.  You’ve seen it, read it, heard it, said it.

What I will do is speak briefly about consent and rape.  What I want is comment and discussion so I’ll keep this brief and to the point.

If someone uses coercion, force  or threat of force to violate the body of a woman, through unwanted physical manipulation up to the point of penetration of her body with a foreign object, then that is, in a word, rape.

Forcing  a woman, for whatever reason, to submit to an unwanted physical penetration, an unwanted intrusion into her private affairs, an unwanted and undesired exposure of her most intimate encounters and her body itself, is rape.

Placing yourself between a woman and the requirements of her health and well being, placing yourself as arbiter of her health and her personal interactions with other people is abuse.

Using force or the threat of force to forbid a woman the access to the things she needs to maintain her health, wellness and happiness is abuse.

Forbidding a woman, through coercion, force or threat of force, the right to choose how she cares for her own body is abuse.

I think we can all agree on those definitions when talking about personal interactions.  If it were a lover, a spouse, a parent, a neighbor, a friend acting in those heinous ways towards a woman, every one of us would be first in line to protect her, help her, see that justice is done.

But we have a situation where it’s not a friend or a relative or a spouse acting in those heinous ways.  It’s Congressmen, CEOs, Priests, and Presidents.    What I ask now, is what do we do about it?


Thoughts about porn workers.
Thoughts about porn workers. avatar

I got into a (brief) argument on the internet.

I know, it’s shocking. Arguments on the intarwebs, who’d’ve thought?

The person I was arguing with self-identified as an “older Southern gentleman”, which demographically (with other cues from the discussion) indicating he was a Christian white male, approximately 60 years old, of a fairly conservative upbringing and culture. The particular thing I took issue with was his utter contempt for men working in pornography. He put the word men in quotation marks and referred to them as “male whores”.

Another person chimed in to say she had never seen pornography, and was sure she wouldn’t like it, as it would be “humiliating” to “watch people mate like animals”.

My point of view was that it was inconsistent to have such contempt for people who openly and legally use sexual activity to make money, but then to not acknowledge that a large number of people (mostly women), use marriage in that same exchange of sexual activity for resources and/or money.

At that point, I dropped the argument, because I couldn’t think of a really good analogy at the time, and it was on another person’s blog. Manners and simple courtesy dictated I drop the discussion. However, I’ve finally managed to come up with something that will describe the disconnect.


I find NASCAR to be an experience, for me, that the female person above imagines pornography would be like to her. I find it repulsive, repugnant, degrading, and immoral to have that level of enthusiasm and sponsorship for blood sports.

Let’s face it, people aren’t that fascinated with watching cars go round and round on a track a gajillion times. They’re waiting for someone to die. Gloriously. In a flaming, smoking explosion that will then be broadcast over and over in gory, graphic, the-media-will-love-it detail.

I guess to a degree I’ll never understand how people can find the morbid obsession with a high-risk sport perfectly okay, but watching two or more people having a great time fucking is somehow demeaning and contemptible.

I’ll make you a deal, Normal People. You stop being assholes to porn stars and the people who watch them, and I’ll keep my opinions about people obsessed with formalized violence with a high risk of death or severe injury to myself.

Experiments in Black & White.
Experiments in Black & White. avatar

(Yeah, I’m cross posting this from my photography blog. Deal with it.  <grin>)
I found myself in a creative mindset tonight and decided to experiment a bit with B&W images. I went back to a set of Jess & Swan Song from June and either did a new treatment of one of the shots I’ve already published or picked out new images from that set to play with. I think you’ll like the results.

Here’s a link to the full gallery: LINK

Jess in B&W.


More images past the fold. Beware, they’re not safe for work.

Dragon*Con 2011 – AAR
Dragon*Con 2011 – AAR avatar

A full after action report from Dragon*Con 2011 will be coming in a day or two, after SAM and I have had a chance to compare notes. It’s always fun sitting down after a major convention and talking about what/who/where/when/how we did when not together.

We apologize for no updates during the convention but Wi-Fi access was spotty to non-existent all weekend. Now that we’re home, though, photos and all the sweaty details to come. Watch this space.


Dragon*Con 2011
Dragon*Con 2011 avatar

My lovely Smart Assed Masochist and I are doing Dragon*Con again this year. There promises to be much debauchery and lechery all weekend. I’ll be posting as or rather just after it happens, so watch this space for more.!

Happy Sadist

A taste of edgeplay…
A taste of edgeplay… avatar

I think I finally understand edge play from the bottom’s perspective. Anal play, both giving and receiving, are a serious turn on for me. I’m also somewhat drawn to medical play with items such as catheters, sounds, speculums, enemas, etc. Combine the two and all kinds of kinky fun can be had with the right precautions.

Lately my anal fun has been anything but fun. Over the last couple of months, I have been undergoing treatments for a very serious medical issue. Now that the swelling and infections are cleared, the doctors can go in to take a look at the root cause.

What does this have to do with edge play and fetish? Here’s where it gets a bit personal. What I have is an acute case of diverticulosis. That is, a swelling or infection in the last few inches of the lower intestine or colon. I spent most of a day in the ER a few weeks ago, on IV antibiotics and a whole lot of pain killers. After two 10-day runs of very strong antibiotics, I’m cleared for a colonoscopy.

A colonoscopy is a routine, but not inconsequential procedure requiring complete sedation and there is, at least in my case, some mild risk of complications.

The thought of a colonoscopy, the deepest, most intense anal penetration I”ve ever experienced is something that turns me on tremendously. The thought of getting a colonscopy, the reasons I’m getting one and what the results may mean for me, both short and long term are somewhat terrifying.

I am at once, both incredibly scared and incredibly turned on by the same thing. This, in my mind, is the definition of Edge Play. There is a small, though manageable, risk involved. There is a sense of helplessness, of putting my trust completely in someone else, and because I’ll be sedated for this, effectively working without a safe word.

Looking at this in a broader light, I begin to understand the attraction of edge play for those on the bottom. For me, the sadist and top in most all of my play, the draw is to be the one in control. I gain my pleasure from the knowledge that someone trusts me enough to put themselves in my power and under my control.

That little sense of fear I get when I think about what I’m going to be undergoing next month only makes the arousal I feel when approaching any new kind of anal play (and medical play as well) that much stronger. Fear and arousal together is not something I’m very familiar with. It’s new and something I think I’m going to explore more in the future.

So tell me, dear readers, what do you do, or have you done in, that gets your juices flowing as well as scares you senseless? Why? And would you do it again?

A few of my favorite things!
A few of my favorite things! avatar

It’s Musical Monday! (either that or I need to have my meds adjusted…)

Crop welts on asses and bruises from hittin’s
Bright scarlet cross-lines and wet cuntlip drippins
Soft pliant submissives tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things!

Next verse awaits.. write it in the comments.

Trivia Tuesdays. — Ask me ANYTHING.
Trivia Tuesdays. — Ask me ANYTHING. avatar

Ok, here’s your chance to ask me anything. When I say anything, I mean just that. You can ask. Anything. You may not get the answer you expect, but I promise that the answer you get will be honest.

On your mark! Get Set! Ask!